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Ultimate Bengali wedding Checklist
Bengali people are known for their love of festivals. If our long standing traditions, rich culture and lineage of customs is anything to go by, it would be safe to say we are capable of magnifying the joys of even every little event.
Also, when it comes to weddings, probably the grandest of them all, we sure do know how to make them memorable!
Bengali weddings tend to last for weeks or even months for the close relatives. As the house starts to fill up with relatives and the shaanaai starts playing, even the neighbours get to know that "The sweet fragrance of love and togetherness is in the Air".
Here we take a look at the sequence of events that string together one of the grandest celebrations:
1) Paka Dekha & Ashirbaad (Engagement):
This is the first piece of the puzzle and a beautiful beginning of a brand new, sacred union of two individuals and two families. The couple are blessed with dhan-dubbo by the parents and other relatives from both parties.
- Boron Dala (A plate with dhan, dubbo, diya etc)
- Misti Mukh (Plate filled with sweets)
- Gifts for both the bride and the groom
2) Aiburo Bhat:
This ritual is all about celebrating and honoring the single life of both the bride and the groom one final time. It may be termed as our very own version of a bachelor/bachelorette party. It generally includes a delicious feast with a variety of their favorite mouth-watering bengali dishes with their close ones.
1) Bengali dishes. Different customised Veg and non-veg items and sweets
3) Sakha Pora:
Sankha and Pola are traditionally considered very important for married women. They signify a married woman and are considered holistic.
- Sankha Bangles (Made of Shell)
- Pola ( Made from Red Coral)
- A Saree for the Bride
4) After that comes events named Adivas Tatva, Jol Chhowa and Dadhi Mangal which are observed at the Bride's place.
Adivas Tatva Checklist:
Jol Chhowa Checklist:
- Kulo (A bamboo plate with mango leaves, dhan-dubbo, diya etc)
- A brass pitcher (Ghot)
Dadhi Mangal checklist:
- Sweet Card (Dahi)
- New Clothes
5) Up next is, Briddhi puja ,
This includes worshipping of lord Narayana & seeking his blessings for the growth and prosperity of the bride and the groom.
- Idol of Lord Narayan
- Kum Kum
- Boron dala
- Beetles leaves (7 of them for bride's puja & 9 of them for groom's puja)
- Supari (7 of them for bride's puja & 9 of them for groom's puja)
- Kori (shells) (7 of them for bride's puja & 9 of them for groom's puja)
6) Gaye holud:
It is the next ritual and it is probably one of the most entertaining events.
Tattwa or gifts are sent to the bride's place which most importantly includes a bowl of Haldi paste. The same paste was earlier applied to the groom and now the bride is to be applied. The tattwa contains
other gifts along with the haldi paste like a saree for the Haldi
ceremony for the bride, Fish colored with sindoor, sarees for other rituals, sweets and jewellery. These things
come in perfectly decorated packages, and tend to become the centre of attraction for the
- Banana plants (4)
- New Cloths
- Dhoop, Diya
7) D-Day: And finally the arrival of D-day! For that, the attire to be worn for both the bride and the groom are very important. Here, we take a look at the Bride's
- A bright, shining, red Benarasi saree which is made of silk & intricately decorated with golden zori works.
- Golden jewellery (necklaces of different types, ear-rings, handful of bangles, nose ring, anklet, maang tika, crown, rings etc)
- Kajal Lata
- Gach Kouto
- Paan Pata
Groom's attire checklist-
- Dhoti made of muslin
- Kurta made of silk & studded with golden buttons
- Topor of shola
- Sandalwood paste tika
- Jor (Silk attire used for changing between rituals)
Now, There are various different rituals that take place during the main marriage ceremony and each of them have their own importance. The priest performs a joggo and chants the mantras. The Main events are Subho drishti, Mala bodol(Exchange of Flower Garlands), Konnya daan and Sindoor daan.
The ultimate checklist for these rituals are-
- A place to perform joggo (light fire)
- Dhan, Dubbo
- Paan, supari
- Boron Dala
- Piri (small wooden seat)
- Kannya sampradaye
- Sacred Thread
- Lajjabastra (a saree)
- A Coin to put the sindoor
With the heartful blessings of the elders and the blessings of gods and the goddesses, the bride and the groom are now believed to be
married to one another forever and are said to be connected by the heart and the soul.